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Tutorial Wizardmaster
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#11 The Apprentice - Page 2 Empty Re: The Apprentice
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calvin624

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haha, I agree reading through it again the fruit does stand out - marble and cannonball any better?
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#12 The Apprentice - Page 2 Empty Re: The Apprentice
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skullmeat

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@calvin...
Yeah, they would work especially if you wanted to keep a more serious mood or let the story flow more evenly and swiftly.

Although... a narrator (not necessarily the author) with some kind of subtle or overt fruit obsession is interesting...
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#13 The Apprentice - Page 2 Empty Re: The Apprentice
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calvin624

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Eleanor unwrapped her melons then squeezed them tenderly ... that sort of thing? haha Very Happy
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#14 The Apprentice - Page 2 Empty Re: The Apprentice
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skullmeat

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Yes, that is one kind of interesting. Laughing
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#15 The Apprentice - Page 2 Empty Re: The Apprentice
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G@MeF@Ce

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secret message below:
Eleanor tenderly squeezing her melons! oh behave~ yeah baby!!! ^,^
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